Wizard's FöЯum v3.0™

Aye, just reinstalled after hearing that our main man the crabster was downloading it. Yeah, definitely brought back some memories.

Anyway, it's actually fucking shit!



FFS Crab.

Okay, like, the combat is pretty good. It's realistic in a way, like in how I had my mercs in a gunfight, and they were all crouched behind cover taking potshots back. I like gunfights like that in games, where it's less about being a jammy bastard and more about playing sensible, keeping to cover and making every bullet count. And the payoff when you finally take down the baddies is definitely worth the struggle, especially when you pop a guy in the head from twenty paces and his head explodes in a fountain of blood and brains.

But the game is just so fucking fiddly. I had little to no idea of what I supposed to be doing, the tactical (main game) screen has aged terribly and gameplay crawls along at a snails pace. Getting from one town to the next was a fucking mission, with just about every other grid on the map populated by bad guys. Leaving you with the choice of fighting them (not always the best move if your team are tired/hurt/low on ammo), sneaking past, or retreating and trying a different route. Needless to say, it makes even the most basic of objectives a complete fucking chore. I mean, it's no bad thing getting in a scrap, as I can't stress how rewarding the combat is. But the samey landscapes make it get old, fast. Plus sometimes you just want to get to your objective rather than have to indulge in another 30-minutes gun battle.

Maybe saying 'It's fucking shit' is a bit harsh. The game has a lot going for it. It's very funny in places, with a lot of self-referential joking about, and you do get a real sense of just being a bunch of nomadic hard-arses. It's easy to bond with your team, and that. And, as I said, the combat is superb.

In fact, I think if anything this game just isn't for me. I have a disastrous attention span, these days I can't really justify losing 4-5 hours on a game when I should be doing something else. I mean, I like a bit of depth and that, but where JA2 cocks up is to throw too much at you at once. I'm barely an hour in and already I'm inundated with shit. Apparently some town want me to establish like a permanent presence, which must have something to do with a button I saw somewhere mentioning setting up recruiting stations or barracks or something. But I'm also having to fart around with keeping tabs on my mercs, like how tired they are, their ammo, but I can't find anywhere I'm supposed to be able to buy ammo. I can't be fucked to go to the next town as the journey is just too much of a cunt. I'm supposed to find some guy called Miguel but I have no idea where he is, and I'm not going to scour the whole map for him as my mercs contracts will have run out by then. There's a screen about my 'profits', and I clicked on a town earlier and there was this big list of information, such as how loyal they were to me, and how much I was earning there. There was something about airspace, a mine, I mean, what the fuck? Too much, man. I have a headache.

I just uninstalled it.

Never heard of this before, TBS games are right up my back alley though and KC knows the score with them, so I reckon I'll give it a try.
Is it abandonware or anything yet perchance?

Nope, but your pirate uncle said he is keeping it at his pirate bay for you.

I think its great. Skippy knows the score, I bet he will like it, the only problem I have with it is the shit graphics.

KC, how did you find Miguel and that? How did you know what the fuck was going on?

Who the fuck is Miguel?

Like, right at the beginning of the game, you have to deliver a letter to him? Isn't that the first mission?

In fact, what the fuck was I supposed to be doing?

Ahh, thats piss easy, like, if you actually had a look at the included manual. It tells you.

Gotta talk to a woman in that first town and she leads you to the rebel base.

Arf... what manual?

Hahaha... I just don't think this game was made for the likes of ol' Banky.

The pdf manual that is included with it.

There was no PDF with mine! And I used the same uncle you PM'd me. Weird.

Yeah there is Banky, it was the exact same download you dingleberry!

Its in the JA2 directory.

MUUUUUUUUUUUUR! FFS BANKY!

Honestly Crab, there were 4 files: 2 image files for the main game and 2 for the add-on. Seriously, if I still had the folder I could post a screen-dump and prove it.

Maybe the tracker got changed or something... ?

EDIT: Or did you mean the PDF got installed with the game, into the main directory? Why the fuck would I go rooting around in the game directory for a manual? I assumed the game had a tutorial/learning curve/clear indication of what the fuck I'm supposed to be doing.

Banky, if you downloaded the game again and looked in the JA2 dir where you installed it there would be a nice little pdf file there. Seriously, you been smoking too much of da chronic at the time or something.

Nah, like I said in the edit, I don't tend to install games and then go to the directory, I just run the game and assume there's a tutorial and that.

Eh, doesn't really matter, I've got too much work and stuff to do to be playing a game with JA2's depth. Would have uninstalled it anyway, tbh.